Going Against the Norm

Don’t be afraid if you find your self going against the norm.

All of my life, I have been a rule follower. A peacemaker. Someone who doesn’t rock the boat. I give in to others desires and step away when a stronger personality takes the lead. Honestly, I don’t mind it, and in many instances prefer to give those bigger decisions to someone else – someone who I feel might be more capable.

It’s a good quality to have – until it isn’t. Staying hidden in the background is comfortable. While I am thankful to be able to see two sides of a situation, I have often lamented the fact that I have trouble taking a one-sided stance on an issue. There is a lot of gray area in life that I feel can’t be solved with a definitive statement. I struggle to explain why I do what I do, or choose what I choose.

Yet, as I contemplated this more, I realized that people don’t always need an explanation – even if they want it.

My husband and I have made many decisions over the years that are outside of the norm. We realized that just because something is expected, it doesn’t mean it’s the right thing for us to do.

Some of these things that we have chosen include:
– My husband not finishing a college degree
– Giving birth at home
– Homeschooling some kids while sending others to school
– Eating foods that are less processed most of the time
– Being a one-income family
– Being open to a large family
– Choosing abstinence during times of fertility when avoiding pregnancy
– Serving our spouse even when it’s hard

I realize that confidence may look different for different people.

The one we recognize is more in your face. These people share their stance with no apologies and can back it up with ease. Then there are those of us with a quiet confidence. We are unwavering in our choice (for the most part), but don’t feel the need to convince anyone that we’re right in our choice. We may share our views, not to convince anyone to change, but to encourage others who may be afraid to make a change.

With that, for those who are more on the quiet side, I hope to encourage you.

I want to encourage you in standing firm in what you know is right for your family. Explore new options that speak to you, but take each opinion with a grain of salt. When you’re unsure, look to the tenants of your Faith to guide you in matters of morals, and to the counsel of your spouse and those you trust in areas that don’t affect the soul. Above all, go to prayer. Trust that God will lead you on the path He is having you go.